Friday, 1 August 2014

d20 Things Found in a Giant's Kitchen Cupboards

Pretend it's a giant!
+Claytonian JP announced a Displacerklaus in July Festivus earlier this week (like a small scale Secret Santicore). I was gifted with an awesome Freelancer ship and crew generator from +Ed Hackett. In return here is my gift to +Chris P.;

d20 Things Found in a Giant of a Gourmet Persuasion's Kitchen Cupboards:  

1) Giant's magically sharpened cutlet knife. Does d4 damage but ignores armor on To Hit rolls for d8 strikes (at which point it returns to being a simple mundane over sized knife).

2) Large jar of extra strength pickling juice. Splashing it on a being's face causes them to be stunned for d6 rounds unless a Save Vs. Poison is made. Ingesting the liquid will reduce a being's intelligence to 1 unless a Save Vs. Poison is made.

3) Eyeball extractor. A mean looking implement, rusted with time and stained from use, vaguely resembling an elongated ice cream scoop with an exaggeratedly sized handle. A fighter wielding it may attempt to take out a target's eye by making a To Hit roll at a negative 6 penalty. If the fighter hits their target and the target fails a Save Vs. Paralyze the eye is plucked from the socket with a meaty plop. Otherwise the Eyeball Extractor can be wielded as d4 blunt weapon.

4) Huge chunks of jerky, as long as man's leg. Indeterminate meat source.

5) Barrel sized glass jars of pickled/pickling organs and limbs.Variety of sources.

6) An extremely odorous and stained half barrel sized iron pot.

7) High quality butter, super enriched. May be used to enhance the taste of any meal dramatically or as smoke-free lantern fuel.

8) Seemingly curdled milk in very ornate brass jugs. Is in fact dreamilk, which causes the drinker to have an extremely restful nights sleep in which they dream of what their heart desires most. Additionally they mutter about the object of their heart's desire the entire evening, completely audible to those around them. The ornate jugs may be of value to oddity collectors.

9) Huge, silver cutlery. Some may have gems embedded in their handles. Valuable.

10) d20 pygmy mushroom men trapped in a breathable wooden box. If somebody has the ability to communicate with them, they will know much of the giant's secrets. They are also quite testy at being trapped and may be aggressive (1HD, D4 attack with clubbed hands).

11) A block/blocks of ever-ice. Always frozen, always cold.

12) A sack of an extremely peppery, nose-stinging spice. Can be thrown in a target's face to blind them or send them into fits of hacking coughs for d4 rounds.

13) A rotting boar carcass, held in large wooden crate. It is sprouting a forest of black corpse mushrooms. They taste like raw meat and restore 1HP, there is d30 of them if any is asking.

14) A giant bloodstained masher. Appears to be able to handle things tougher than boiled potatoes.

15) A large glass jar filled with floating pickled brains. Save Vs Magic to avoid hearing the whispered voices of the owners of the brains. They will be jabbering nonsensically, unaware of their disembodied predicament.

16) A sack of flour, quivering every few seconds. If prodded/investigated a mass of plump pink worms explode from the sack. They are harmless and delicious.

17) Delicious smelling schnapps in a dusty, old bottle. If drunk, make a Save Vs Poison. If failed pass out into merry sleep for 8 hours. If passed the drinker is roaring drunk for 8 hours and in that time feels no fear.

18) Melon sized onions, the slightest whiff of their exposed flesh causes tears to stream from now severely stinging eyes.

19) Pile of rusted, used and discarded (giant) knives.

20) A sack containing d10 handfuls of sweet smelling ground crystals. Allowing them to dissolve in your mouth results in d8 combat rounds of automatically getting first initiative and plus 2 To Hit. After the d8 rounds are up the consumer of the crystals will automatically go last in initiative and attack at a minus 4 to hit for 2 combat rounds.  They taste so delicious a Save Vs. Magic is required to not immediately scoop another handful of crystals up into your mouth once their initial effects wear off. If there is no crystals left and somebody fails there Save to helplessly eat more, they pass out unconscious for 12 hours.